Government arrests itself in crackdown on extremists

The entire cabinet was arrested today under a government crackdown on political extremists in the public sector.

The government crackdown is part of the Home Office's efforts to root out what it describes as "extremist individuals, groups and organisations consciously seeking to gain positions of influence to better enable them to promote their own extremist agendas." After careful consideration the government concluded that the Conservative Party perfectly matched this description.

"We are fighting political extremism in all its forms," a government spokesman told us from his police cell. "A party that advocates a crackdown on essential freedoms, models its trade union legislation on the Nazis and is presiding over a radical shrinkage of the state that will push millions into poverty is clearly extremist. We had no choice but to throw ourselves in jail."

However, judges later ordered the government's release. "This country has a long and proud history of protecting political and religious freedoms," the judges ruled. "As a result, our interpretation of the legislation is that it only applies to brown people."